Friday, November 20, 2015

the truth behind "Can't Live Without You"

Love is funny as fuck. It makes you do some silly shit and brings a lot of headaches. lol I sound mad huh? haha I'm kidding.. love has its ups and its downs. Every relationship is suppose to better you or give you something to take with you for the rest of your life. There's a crazy ass story behind "Can't Live Without You"... I met a chick in H&M.. dated her for a few months and boom.. we was in love!
Now I'm a tough ass dude.. but she was different. She brought a different side out of me. I've always been the type of dude to dip if I'm not feeling it or if things don't go smoothly. She taught me the true essence of fighting.. not physically but fighting for someone that you believe in no matter the circumstance.

I'll admit we rushed things. We didn't hop in a relationship immediately but we got tangled into one another and did relationship-like things. Sex brings on so many emotions but I also believe seeing someone almost everyday does the same thing. I learned her.. and she learned me. I had my walls up but I could feel myself believing in her and trusting her with a side of me that I had never shared.

I'm not saying I was ever a dog or anything but I will admit I never valued my ex's the way they should've been valued. My "no negativity/bull shit" attitude towards relationships with them prolly hindered the growth in our situation. I just tried to do shit differently with her. I would learn that she didn't uphold her end of the bargain. It was her birthday and we had a crazy ass time. Crazy in a good way.. We did things we never did and I made sure that I prepared a night that was special for her...one that she would remember for the rest of her life.

The night went hella good. I'm not gone get into all the details but we were both so fucked up. The night progressed... I just remember the sound of the door being banged on. We were at her apartment sleep. I could hear the pounding at the door. I was so deep in my sleep that it felt like a weird dream. I immediately jumped up and to my surprise it was the cops. I opened the door and asked the cop "Whats good?".

I'm standing at the door in my fucking underwear and its cold as hell. I'm drunk as hell.. I'm sleepy as hell. I'm like

he like yeah.. "I'm looking for (insert her name). Someone reported her missing yesterday. Where is she at?"
So I go wake her up. It took me about 5 minutes to get her up because as I mentioned we were both gone.. So I tell her whats going on.. she looking at me and the cop like  


I asked the cop "Who the fuck reported her missing?".. He says (insert her weird ass thirsty ass ex-boyfriend). I was like "WHO DAT?" 

She explains that its her ex-boyfriend. I honestly didn't know what the hell to say. I kept my cool and broke up with her a few days later. I found out that the person that kept blowing her up all the time and texting her was not her cousin ..it was this nigga!

She told me how he didn't take their break up well and how he wouldn't get lost. See here's the thing.. all she had 2 do was let me know and I could've made that trip and handled the shit

Nah I'm playing but she could've told me so that we could've handled it like two adults. She put me in a place where I didn't know what to do or where to go. I walked away... and it was hard but everything in me wanted to be there with her..  I just needed some time to figure shit out and to really see shit from a big picture. And thats how "Can't Live Without You" was birthed in 2013. I wrote the song from a crazy space I was in. I didn't have all the answers so for once I let my heart make the decision. 

This record is definitely a highlight on the project. The raw emotions and the vulnerability behind the record. I felt hella naked typing this and writing this record but thats what music is about.. sharing bits of yourself even if you're not so proud of them. Love can make u make some fucked up decisions but its love.. and you know they say its better to have loved than not have loved at all. lol I'm corny.. i know.

One thing I learned though is that whenever you get into a relationship completely wrap things up with your ex. It's the least you can do for the other person you may eventually meet. Trust me I'm from Chicago so that situation could've went 2 or 3 different ways but I'm out here trying to make my dreams come true lol I'm not about to get locked up for a female..naw lol I AINT GOING lol

are we still together ...you ask?
Listen to the rest of the project.. you'll see! haha #SONGSFOR THE JEEP

Download "Can't Live Without You"
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